33 Creepy Products That Are Surprisingly Useful
A coin bank so you can rest easy knowing you're saving money or lose sleep knowing you just fed a quarter to a cursed reptilian face.
2.A pimple-popping toy to give you just the satisfying stress relief without the scarring that often accompanies it.
Promising review: "It is addictively gross and relaxing all at once. It sat next to my computer and I found myself popping and picking at it when I was bored. The pus is surprisingly pleasant-smelling and was nice on my hands." —Jill Diamond
Get it from Amazon for $19.99 (available in three colors).
3.A phallic bottle opener so you can be well-endowed in the kitchen.
Promising review: "Solid wood, with a nice heft." —Amazon Customer
Get it from Amazon for $15.50+ (available in six colors).
4.A handmade compact mirror made of dentures, because [Thom Yorke voice] you're a creeeep.
Promising review: "This is so disgustingly COOL! Shipping was prompt, too. I will be the envy of all my friends." —Anonymous
Get it from Concave Oblivion on Etsy for $250.
A "boyfriend" body pillow that, according to some reviewers, is better than the flesh-and-bones version.
A collection of upcycled baby doll parts for around the home.
7.A licking brush for your cat that is also, oddly, therapeutic for you.
Or, avoid the "creepy" factor altogether by using as a regular brush!
Promising review: "I have enjoyed using the device, and it has certainly helped me connect with my favorite pussy cat, Colonel Angus, a lot better. I discovered this marvelous product while talking to a canoe driver who had gone under the bridge; we stopped off for a box lunch at the Y (clam and pie - YUM!) and she told me that she'd found out about the product from a guy who was yodeling down in the valley. So word of mouth is definitely spreading. My family doesn't really understand it (this isn't something I can do when Aunt Flo is in town, for instance), and a lot of guys I know just wouldn't do it, but I love it. The only complaint that I could possibly have about the device is the name — Licki? There must be a cunning linguist on staff who could come up with something else to call it." —Maurice Cobbs
Get it from Amazon for $20.99+ (available in pink and glow-in-the-dark).
8.A pair of grassy flip-flops, if you want to experience the sensation of grass between your toes year-round. It's Fashion, look it up!!
Promising review: "I bought these flip-flops for my mom because she loves the feeling of walking on grass, but hates getting her feet dirty. I gave these to her and she thought it was the funniest thing in the world until she put them on — now I can't get her to take them off! Great product for a small investment." —Jackie
Get it from Amazon for $17.98+ (available in sizes XS-L).
A bug catcher vacuum that sucks unwanted visitors up into a releasable vessel so you never have to get too close to them.
10.A personalized ski mask — you upload an image and they'll print it onto the material — for a new way to keep warm during winter.
Promising review: "Absolutely terrifying. It *almost* looks like my boss, if he were a nightmare demon. He’s gonna hate it when he finds out!" —Abby
Get it from Firebox for $16.99 (also available in sets of two and five).
11.A pillow that'll send chills down your spine while also offering great back support.
Promising review: "I have shown a picture of mine to several people and they ask if there is a 'form' or something making that shape but there is no 'form' — it is totally flat, an optical illusion. LOVE LOVE LOVE! Very impressed with the shipping time as well." —Lisa Yockey
Get it from wfrancisdesign on Etsy for $19.64+ (available in five sizes).
12.A pack of 1,500 (one-thousand five hundred!) live ladybugs if you need a natural remedy to save your aphid-invaded plants.
Promising review: "First, keep in mind that 1,500 ladybugs is A LOT of ladybugs. Every once in a while, my hibiscus gets an aphid invasion. Normally, I notice and clip the buds and flowers off and the problem stays manageable. Recently, I didn't and those darn aphids got out of control, then ants discovered the aphids and all their wonderful honeydew and moved in. My poor hibiscus started to suffer and it was just a bit of a mess. Enter ladybugs. I have a son who is almost 4 and I thought that these would be great entertainment for him, as well as help get rid of our problem. We wound up putting them all over all of our plants since our area is relatively small and there were quite a lot of these guys. My son loved the ladybugs crawling all over and then seeing them eating the aphids and anything else that was attacking some of our plants. Within days, my hibiscus started looking a lot healthier and started to sprout more green leaves and healthy buds! Thank you, ladybugs, for saving my plants! I think it's also important to note that I don't think there was even one ladybug in the bag that didn't survive the journey. I let most of them just crawl out of the bag themselves and had none left behind. —Samantha Bilodeau
Get it from Amazon for $3.05.
13.An egg separator that's doing more for noses than Gaga did in A Star Is Born.
Promising review: "The recipient laughed so hard he blew snot. Much more fun that any other method." —AJ49
Get it from Amazon for $8.99.
14.A set of mop slippers so you can get some cleaning done while you walk (or dance) around your home.
Promising review: "I LOVE these. While just walking through the house, I'm dusting too. And living in the desert — that's a must daily. They are perfect. I sprayed some Endust on them, turned up the music, and danced my time away. Works great!" —Dave and Jay Raber
Get it from Amazon for $12.99 (for three pairs).
15.A blood-and-guts polymer-clay phone case that'll shield your phone from scratches but won't shield bystanders from a real jump-scare.
Get it from BeardedEye on Etsy for $115 (and check out the full collection).
16.An "Elon's Musk" air freshener because, in the words of Grimes, we appreciate power and leathery fragrances for our cars!
Promising review: "Smells just like Elon!" —Rebekah
Get it from Firebox for $6.99.
17.A blob of fat that doubles as a fridge magnet.
Promising review: "Once I saw that this one had a magnet, I had to have it. Instead of having a replica lying around the house, it sticks to my fridge door, which is much more useful in reminding me to eat healthier and be conscious of what I put into my body. The size is good, as it fits comfortably in the palm of my hand, and doesn't take up too much space on the fridge." —Coby Isley
Get it from Amazon for $10.94.
18.Some very moody porcelain cups to match your three big moods: teasing, grumpy, and "kissing."
Get it from SINDstudio on Etsy for $28.50+ (available in three varieties).
19.A candle molded from a real, human spine that you'll surely wax poetic about.
Get it from CreepyCandles on Etsy for $24.95.
20.A personalized suitcase with your face superimposed on it so you'll never mix up your bag with someone else's at baggage claim.
Promising review: "Photo is so clear on the case, and love the silky feel of the wetsuit-like material. Love it so much we’re ordering another!!" —Alana
Get it from Firebox for $26.99+ (available in small, medium, and large).
21.A tissue box that only works as a tissue box if you reach inside of a cat's butt.
Promising review: "We are still laughing about this! It is hideously funny, but probably only to those with the right sense of humor." —Ann Vee
Get it from Amazon for $34.94 (available in black and white and orange tabby).
22.Another to file under the "cat butt" category: A set of coasters to set your bevs on.
Promising review: "Hysterical item for cat lovers! Everyone gets a good chuckle once they realize what they are about to rest their drink on." —D McTavish
Get it from Amazon for $24.99.
23.A squirrel feeder that's also a unicorn head so you can get hours of magical entertainment from this dumb gag.
Promising review: "This squirrel feeder is absolutely amazing. Truly works. Endless entertainment. The squirrels loved this so much they tore through the nose holes to get the nuts out. Would recommend for a good laugh." —Amazon Customer
Get it from Amazon for $16.99 or Jet for $15.82.
24.A pack of sandwich bags with bugs on them, because you've heard of bug repellent but what about repellant for coworkers who steal your lunch out of the kitchen fridge?
Promising review: "The practical joker in me loves these. Take your lunch to work in these and watch your workmates scream when you eat lunch at your desk! Use them to store your lunch in the company fridge ... no one will take your sandwich." —Mandy
Get it from Amazon for $9.99 (for a 24-pack).
A cat-paw doorstep that you'd be fe-lyin to yourself if you said you didn't absolutely need.
26.The Steve Buscemi/Mona Lisa crossover you've always dreamed of in the form of an intricate shower curtain.
Get it from MisterBlack on Society6 for $55.99.
27.A handmade jewelry holder that has seen some shit.
Get it from CaffeinatedBees on Etsy for $20 (available in three eye colors and with or without gold accents; and check out the full collection).
28.An LED ballsack to hang from your bike if you get testy about reckless drivers at night.
Promising review: "Works like a charm. Also something that cracks me up: One nut is lower down then the other! It's perfect." —Andrew P
Get it from Amazon for $10.96+ (available in three colors).
29.A bar of soap that is, in fact, shaped like a chicken drumstick and recommended for sensitive skin. We love a chicken-drumstick sensitive-skin moment!
Promising review: "Looks so real and smells like cotton candy." —Shawn
Get it from Amazon for $10.78.
30.Or, a true "status soap" in the form of a finger. That status is: Creep.
Get it from LoveLeeSoaps on Etsy for $7 (for four).
A toilet paper spindle you can record voice notes through and shake guests to their very core with as they sit down on the john.
32.A very warm wearable blanket — because, look, it's minimalism! Minimal human shape.
Promising review: "I work from home and my husband loves to save money on the heating bill in the winter. Now I can wear my Cocoonsie instead of dragging huge blankets all around the house. I had tried the Snuggie before, but my backside was cold and I can't type with how big the sleeves are. I'm really excited how versatile this is and would definitely recommend!! I even got one for my pregnant sister-in-law who lives up north! She's already obsessed with how warm and comfortable it is. Added bonus: My kitty loves cuddling inside my Cocoonsie while we are laying around too." —Amazon Customer
Get it from Amazon for $39.99 (available in sizes XS-L and in four colors).
33.And a monster colander, if cute-creepy is more your speed.
Promising review: "My wife received this as an Xmas gift from myself, and she smiles every time she pulls it out from its home in the cabinet. That alone makes it worth five stars in my book, but it's also sized nicely (just slightly smaller than a standard colander), is made of very strong plastic, and has extremely expressive eyes, which make for great handles. What's not to like?" —Gentleman Rook
Get it from Amazon for $19.20.
The reviews in this post have been edited for length and clarity.
Looking for more off-the-beaten path things? Look no further:
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